I’ll be honest.

This experience did not go as many of you think it would.

This was the most beautiful, dark, mind-expanding, soul-crushing, transcendent, and scary experience that I’ve ever had in my entire life.

Many of you reading this might have heard of the term ‘ego death’.

And this is exactly what happened during my experience with 7G of mushrooms.

What motivated me to do this you might wonder?

Terrence Mckenna is famous for his concept surrounding the heroic dose of psilocybin mushrooms.

His method for transcendence includes taking 5G of mushrooms on an empty stomach, in a dark room, with a little bit of cannabis to enhance the visuals.

I did exactly this with an extra 2G of mushrooms late at night on my 20th birthday. (Exactly 1 year ago since publishing this.)

Why am I sharing this with you?

So you can learn from my experience and evaluate if this is the right approach for you if you want to experience ego death.

let’s hop in…

The Trip Of A Lifetime

I got ready for this transcendent experience with my normal ritual…

• kundalini breathwork

• relaxing yoga

• meditation

• intention setting

I could not wait for this experience to take place because I was going to understand the universe completely.

Or so I thought…

Boy was I wrong.

I climbed into my comfy bed with the warm mattress on for ultimate comfort.

I popped on my headphones and created a playlist of ambient tracks to guide me through the experience.

Every track created a different state of being with a different experience.

At the start of my experience I felt really good. I started crying at about 1 hour into it to let go of all the heavy baggage I was carrying around from my childhood trauma.

I won’t be going to deep into this for the sake of privacy towards those who hurt me.

But after 1 hour I could already feel lighter and cultivated a deep sense of what is truly important…

Family, Gratefulness, & Presence.

I thought it was only smooth sailing from here as the hard work had already been done.

I was wrong again…

Endless Darkness

Eventually I chose to lay down and close my eyes so the visuals can start doing their thing.

It created these beautiful swirly patterns that had no form.

Ever-changing geometrical shapes took over my scope of vision and I was immersed in the most beautiful symphony of colors, shapes, and patterns I’ve ever seen.

I eventually came across the HOPF Fibration and it symbolized the experience perfectly.

This is known as the most important object in the entire universe according to Eric Weinstein on the Joe Rogan podcast.

I enjoyed this until a track popped up that I was not expecting.

I chose the playlist very carefully but must have missed the dark aura of this one particular track.

At the start of this track the mood instantly shifted.

I took me into the darkest corner of my being.

I was exposed to everything I was scared of.

• Insects

• Wild Animals

• Torture

• Abduction

• etc.

All my fears came up to the surface.

But I trusted the guidance of the universe and chose to sit with it.

How could God create these things?

Why is there so much suffering?

How could our God allow this?

Then it struck me like a lightning bolt.

God is not just this loving figure we picture it to be.

It is a transcendent phenomenon encapsulating everything we experience in reality.

God is just pure imagination that just does not stop creating.

This includes all evil.

This includes suffering.

This includes darkness.

By combining this knowledge with what i’ve learned from multiple ancient texts it was quite clear to me that God is transcendent of good and evil.

God allows the soul to incarnate into a specific experience based on it’s karmic debt.

So every experience of suffering, darkness, and evil is simply an experience God chose to have through the collective soul.

Every soul must go through these experiences to cultivate moralistic understanding, ethical values, and universal lessons.

Note that I only realized this during retrospection.

My experience was far more terrifying because I was not accompanied by this wisdom throughout the trip…

And this is where everything went south.

The experience was getting more intense as the song went on.

I was faced with my worst fear by remembering a nightmare that I had about a centipede crawling up my neck and biting into my flesh to eat my brain.

And for anyone who has done psychedelics, you know that once the thoughts enters the stream of consciousness, it’s extremely hard to escape it.

My mind started playing tricks on me…

I thought that experience was real and my nightmare just simulated the experience while I was asleep.

It created hallucinations through my physical senses and convinced me that the centipede was still in my bedroom. I freaked out multiple times and whenever I would calm myself down I would be reminded by any form of physical touch from my bedding as the room was pitch black and I had no way of figuring out what was really going on.

My heart started racing.

It got to a point where it seemed like my heart was racing at 120 beats per minute.

I thought I was going to die.

Every breath seemed like the last one.

It took some time to accept it.

And once I did I was launched into the afterlife.

Ego death like nothing i’ve ever seen before.

Secrets Of The Universe

Once I accepted my death was knocking at my doorstep an immediate peace flooded my body.

With this sensation came the tsunami of visions from the future and the past.

I saw how Jesus died on the cross. It felt like I was Jesus hanging on that cross.

I immediately understood the infinite amount of love that existed in his heart.

How he chose this path so that no-one else had to.

His soul knew exactly what it signed up for.

I saw what heaven looked like.

An infinitely sophisticated realm of alien-like beings that have reached transcendent states of consciousness and highly developed spiritual intelligence.

I saw how the universe created itself and how it all started from one singular atom that realized consciousness and exploded into an infinitely expanding observational state.

The visions kept coming and I saw symbolic messages carved by satanic rituals and how deeply ancient cultures were linked to communicating with spirits from multiple vibrational states.

I travelled through time as a soul and experienced the unconscious files located in my DNA.

I accessed the information located within my DNA that was passed down by my ancestors.

It is unexplainable with logic.

The Mind Of God

Note: The following chapter will include some of the most unconventional, outrageous, and twisted ideas you’ve ever heard of.

I’m not even claiming that these ideas are true. They are simply what I’ve experienced.

If you are closed-minded, easily offended, and hyper-defensive of your ideology I recommend you stop reading immediately.

I’m just gonna go ahead and say it.

You are God experiencing itself in human form.

We are all connected by one consciousness.

Quantum physics proves this phenomenon with reason and logic.

Atoms act like they have their own mind. They change their behavior when under observation.

Indicating some form of conscious decision. Mind and matter are intimately connected.

The quantum field connects us all beyond the scope of our 3D reality.

We are all connected through the quantum field.

Much like what the yogis have been teaching for over 5000 years now.

These are scientific facts.

So what if the quantum field is conscious?

Would that not be the closest representation of God?

• Omnipresent

• Infinite

• Transcendent

• Interconnected

Whatever your idea of God is. It’s propably wrong.

Including my own idea of God. Propably wrong.

The problem with dogmatic religion is that people try to define an undefinable phenomenon.

But our egos latch on to the idea that we have understood the creator of the entire universe.

I can tell you now that any idea you have of God collapses into the truth of experience…

For which there is no explanation.

Here is an image that encapsulates what I experienced.

Pure mind.

Aftermath

When I woke up from my slumber it felt like I shifted realities.

My old self had died and I entered a new state of consciousness with much more wisdom, clarity, and zest for life.

A new reality has emerged before my eyes with a blank slate.

I got up, switched on the lights, and looked in the mirror.

There I was. Beautiful as ever. Not harmed. And completely relaxed.

What the fuck just happened?

How the fuck am I going to explain this to people?

How will I be able to live with myself?

What is the meaning of life now?

These questions continued for an entire year and I could not answer any single one of them clearly.

This is my attempt to encapsulate what I have experienced.

I know the ideas I have mentioned here are unconventional.

But there is no other way to communicate what I have experienced.

I hope you have approached this message with an open mind and an understanding heart.

That is all for now.

Thank you.